Imagine pouring your heart into a career that finally feels like 'you,' only to have your body scream for mercy—could this be the bittersweet reality of chasing passion at any cost?
Dive into today's edition of Good Job, Slate's friendly go-to advice column tackling all things work-related. Whether it's a minor office hiccup or a major dilemma, we're here to help. Got a query? Drop it anonymously to Laura Helmuth and Doree Shafrir via this form (https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScAyhXmriThctO-0OxkZlSWl9hQahMAAI1lVnC6e9LKIdVw/viewform?usp=sf_link). We promise discretion!
Dear Good Job,
I'm a woman in my mid-fifties, with a career spanning various industries since my teen years. At last, I've landed in a profession that truly lights me up. Sure, the pay isn't spectacular, but it gives me that essential spark—knowing I'm making a positive difference in someone's day-to-day existence, which is rare and invaluable. That said, the role is incredibly taxing on the body. I was already grappling with nerve issues before starting here, and as temperatures drop, the discomfort ramps up. It peaks after shifts where I push patients in wheelchairs that weigh two or even three times what I do—a core duty with no easy substitutes. Some days, the pain is so crippling I can't even roll out of bed, leading to absences. And don't get me started on my menstrual cycles; they're becoming more intense, causing further downtime. Doctors have checked me out, and everything comes back normal. They suggest steroids for relief or birth control to halt my periods, but I'm wary due to past side effects and the potential risks I've researched. I can't keep this up forever—I've quit a beloved job before when similar symptoms kicked in, like neck, hand, foot, and back pain, relentless fatigue, and sensitivity to cold, especially in chilly AC settings. Job hunting hasn't panned out; no callbacks yet. Any wisdom to share?
—Working Through the Ache
Dear Working Through the Ache,
First off, I'm genuinely sorry you're enduring this relentless discomfort, especially when medical insights have fallen short. But here's where it gets controversial: is prioritizing passion over physical health a noble pursuit, or a risky gamble that could lead to long-term regret? Most people miss how workplace accommodations might just be the game-changer you need.
Have you looped in your boss about this? From what you've described, it seems you've been pushing through quietly and opting for sick days when it overwhelms you. Still, exploring adjustments could open doors—maybe lighter duties, ergonomic tools, or even a shift to a less demanding position within the same organization? It's worth a chat to brainstorm possibilities, even if you believe no one else can handle that wheelchair task regularly. For instance, some workplaces introduce rotating schedules or assistive devices to distribute the load.
While I'm no doctor and won't pretend to offer medical guidance, I strongly encourage consulting additional specialists for fresh perspectives and potential alleviation. This might include a rheumatologist or pain management expert to dig deeper. Additionally, chatting with a lawyer could clarify if worker's compensation applies, given how your job aggravates your condition, or if disability benefits are on the table. My concern is the sustainability—prolonged strain could cause irreversible harm. Aging gracefully is hard enough without this added layer!
And this is the part most people miss: what if seeking help isn't just about your job, but about reclaiming control over your well-being? Wishing you the best—hope relief finds you soon.
Please keep submissions concise (under 150 words), avoid duplicates across columns, and note we can't edit or delete after posting. Use a pseudonym for privacy. Your story might inspire others in similar spots.
Dear Good Job,
Roughly a year back, I stepped away from my creative freelance venture for the security of a steady 9-to-5. Now, I assist a highly affluent individual whose wealth shields her from market ups and downs. She's wonderfully devoted to her team, values my contributions, and hints at a long-term partnership. I'm paid a bit more than the role demands, though it's less than my peak freelance earnings—currently at $70,000, which covers basics in my area but leaves me living paycheck to paycheck. I like her personally, yet much of the work feels empty and draining, clashing with her lifestyle choices and principles.
I'm in the midst of interviews for a position echoing my old business strengths (where I excelled and found joy!), minus the ownership hassles like marketing and overhead. It offers $110,000 plus perks, bonuses, and profit shares—a significant leap. The downside? It's with a newer firm in expansion mode. The sector seems resilient amid economic shifts, but ditching guaranteed stability for uncertainty feels daunting. Last year's career pivot was emotionally exhausting, and while this feels like returning to a familiar, rewarding path, I'm terrified of another blunder. Sure, I could snag another administrative gig later, but with the economy as it is, top salaries aren't exactly plentiful.
With an offer likely imminent, how do I navigate this? What probes should I make to the team, my significant other, and myself to ensure a smart move? It feels like swapping one golden ticket for another, with high risks either way—guidance appreciated!
—Feather in the Nest
Dear Feather in the Nest,
Let's pause to celebrate: You're in a solid spot with a tolerable (if not thrilling) role, and now a dream opportunity beckons—a nearly 60% pay boost and a return to your passion. No wrong choice here, but I'd lean towards embracing the new gig. Long-term, aligning with your skills and aspirations, plus influencing growth at an emerging company, trumps personal assistance to a tycoon.
That said, vetting the startup's viability is spot-on. If VC-funded, sites like Crunchbase reveal their funding stage and amounts. During interviews, inquire about your role's evolution over one, three, and five years; their big-picture objectives; and core values (a must—they should articulate them clearly, or beware red flags). Once an offer arrives, probe their cash burn rate, remaining funds timeline, fundraiser plans, recruitment roadmap (including upcoming hires across departments for the next 6-12 months), and work-life equilibrium. Expect overtime, or do folks enjoy vacations? Chat with current or ex-employees for insider takes: leadership vibes, advancement paths, and more.
After thorough research, trust your gut. For beginners unsure about career switches, remember: stability is comforting, but stagnation can erode your spirit over time. What if the 'risk' is actually the key to fulfillment?
—Doree
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I pen pieces on societal topics for a blog targeting young women, which often ignites fiery discussions in the replies. The issue? My boundary-challenged mother has signed up and jumps in, debating dissenters—under a username that blatantly reveals her as MY MOM. Advice, anyone? (Check out this related piece: https://slate.com/human-interest/2013/07/dear-prudence-the-blog-commenter-of-my-nightmares-is-my-mother.html)
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What do you think—should passion ever take a backseat to health, or is that just defeatist thinking? And in a volatile job market, is chasing stability over excitement a safer bet? Share your takes below; we'd love to hear if you agree, disagree, or have your own stories to add!
